Worst Pick-Up Lines with A.S. Green

Mind you, this was in high school where everything was “the worst” because no one knew what they were doing and we were all fumbling around trying to be whatever we thought we were trying to be…. So. There was this boy. Cute. Sweet. Captain of the football team.

We’d been dancing around each other for a while. I was talking to him at his locker, and he had a bit of a cold.

He said, “Sorry, I need to find a Kleenex” to which I said (so I suppose this makes it MY worst pickup line, not his), “Here. Use my shirt.”

I was totally joking, but I held up the bottom edge of this cute top I was wearing.

He laughed and said, “Seriously?”

I said, “Of course.”

So he bent over and blew his nose on my shirt.

We’ve been married over twenty years now.